Obsessive Sex Book Excerpt
From Chapter One: Good Sex or a Good God?
Jerome is leaving the Friday evening Happy Hour with the most voluptuous woman any man would desire. Her entire package is together: hair, eyes, legs, waistline and nails. She has a whopping professional career. She and Jerome take off for dinner and drinks. Afterwards, she climbs into his Lambourghini and together they race to her house to take off their clothes and enjoy wild sex variations. He is a consummate lover. She is a dream. Jerome attempts to leave at 2:00 a.m. Immediately, this astonishing woman protests, "Why do you always have to get up and leave?" Jerome responds, "You know that all my wife wants is for me to be home by 3:00 a.m. because the kids may wake up."
Jerome and his wife have an agreement. They have an open marriage. They are two consenting adults who know what they want out of marriage, and in life. She permits him to date, openly, as long as he is back in the house before the kids awaken in the morning. She dates too. He pays most of the household bills, and she manages to get most of the housework done. Both affluent, he owns an architecture firm and she is one of two major partners in her own law firm.
Seem too good to be true? People pattern falsely glamorized sex lifestyles. It seems good and exciting but there is more talk than truth. The bottom line of sex is that sex has a very large public image and the body of knowledge about sex is a mixture largely of conjecture, hype, braggadocio, fairy-tales, fantasy, outright lies, frenzy, insanity, outrage, miseducation and hazardous misconceptions, all that keep everyone talking about it. In fact, there are more people involved in talking about what they are doing which is influencing the spread of deviant behavior of others who will listen and try it. If they are not trying it, statistics inform us that 54 percent of men are at least thinking about sex all through the day, as well as 19 percent of women. If women don't think about sex daily, then it is on their minds several times a week for 67 percent of women. Thus, 97 percent of all adult men and 96 percent of women have sex on their minds most frequently throughout the day and week. Even in our culture, standards of sexual behavior have become so obfuscated that people believe they can create their own rules as they go along treacherously in life. Vicarious living is seductive. Sex is exciting and creates many copy cats.
Can two consenting adults permit each other to date other partners outside of their marriage? No! Jerome and his wife have gone awry! A couple permitting their partner in marriage to cheat is like me telling the people of Japan that it is legal to have free cable-TV. In reality, I have no jurisdiction to authorize laws or legislate anything to be free in Japan. Japan's population and commerce make the rules for Japan. Likewise, neither the husband or wife has the authority, in the sight of God, to reinvent the rules of marriage. God devises all laws of heaven and earth! God's rules govern our homes, our lives, our sex affinities and our bedrooms!
Every day, people get married in the sight of God but never pay attention to the Godly covenants to which they commit, in the sight of God. Other couples write their own covenants, and in order to avoid committing to God's covenants for marriage, will omit the essential rules of God in their own rewritten version of the vows. Impossible! Marriage embodies a commitment to a spiritual, a physical endeavor, as well as to an external community. The spiritual and the sexual must be in concert with God. The external community means that once pronounced as a married couple in Christ, the couple's role is not to just feed on each other and look only at themselves to ensure their own internal happiness. Rather, God commands us to be brought as a couple together for a larger purpose. We must work for the kingdom of God to spread God's love, and to exert our help externally to the saved and the lost community of people around us. More will be discussed about community later. For now, we focus upon just sex and spirit.The first key is: We must know the rules for sex in a right relationship , and we must also know the rulemaker.
What Is Sex and What Is Love?
When we say, “I love you” are we really speaking about sex? Are the terms love and sex interchangeable? Should we say, "I love sex with you?" instead of "I love you?" The answer is no! Sex and love are completely different. Love comes first. In fact, when we really love, sex is a byproduct of that love. What is love? The elaborteness of that term, love, is best described in the Greek, as philosophy and theology provide it. In the Greek language, the term love is expressed in three different superlatives with obvious nuances and more precise expression. One of these words for love is the kind that lives in a right relationship. It is a very special love. This special kind of love is not open for redefinition.
Love in the Greek is expressed as Eros, philia, and agape. Eros is an aesthetic love. Eros has evolved to be known as romantic love and the beauty thereof between two people. Eros, the mythological persona, degenerated into a mischievous child and is associated with Pothos (“longing”) or Himeros (“desire”) both embodying passionate, sexual love. Eros is the base for the word erotica or erotikos, which is the external stimuli with the objective for the arousal of the sexual desire. The characteristics of Eros, or romantic love are excessive self-love, narcissistic, egotistical, vainglorious, and conceited, since it seeks to please itself rather than others, though it would appear to be an outward love. Eros type of love is the physicality, the feeling, and the gratification of wants. It fills absolutely no real need. Eros is fulfillment of a purely recreational desire.
One woman disclosed to me that she was disappointed with her boyfriend because he will have nothing to do with her unless she can have sex with him. She says, "He only recognizes me with my clothes off; buck naked." He will even ask her that question before he commits to come over to visit. Another man told me that his girlfriend changes men like she changes clothes. She takes on each boyfriend for their different talents in the sex act, for example, one of them is a good kisser, one of them caresses well, one of them is more sensuous leading up to the sex act. This fits an Eros type love.
Order your autographed copy of Obsessive Sex right now!
From Chapter One: Good Sex or a Good God?
Jerome is leaving the Friday evening Happy Hour with the most voluptuous woman any man would desire. Her entire package is together: hair, eyes, legs, waistline and nails. She has a whopping professional career. She and Jerome take off for dinner and drinks. Afterwards, she climbs into his Lambourghini and together they race to her house to take off their clothes and enjoy wild sex variations. He is a consummate lover. She is a dream. Jerome attempts to leave at 2:00 a.m. Immediately, this astonishing woman protests, "Why do you always have to get up and leave?" Jerome responds, "You know that all my wife wants is for me to be home by 3:00 a.m. because the kids may wake up."
Jerome and his wife have an agreement. They have an open marriage. They are two consenting adults who know what they want out of marriage, and in life. She permits him to date, openly, as long as he is back in the house before the kids awaken in the morning. She dates too. He pays most of the household bills, and she manages to get most of the housework done. Both affluent, he owns an architecture firm and she is one of two major partners in her own law firm.
Seem too good to be true? People pattern falsely glamorized sex lifestyles. It seems good and exciting but there is more talk than truth. The bottom line of sex is that sex has a very large public image and the body of knowledge about sex is a mixture largely of conjecture, hype, braggadocio, fairy-tales, fantasy, outright lies, frenzy, insanity, outrage, miseducation and hazardous misconceptions, all that keep everyone talking about it. In fact, there are more people involved in talking about what they are doing which is influencing the spread of deviant behavior of others who will listen and try it. If they are not trying it, statistics inform us that 54 percent of men are at least thinking about sex all through the day, as well as 19 percent of women. If women don't think about sex daily, then it is on their minds several times a week for 67 percent of women. Thus, 97 percent of all adult men and 96 percent of women have sex on their minds most frequently throughout the day and week. Even in our culture, standards of sexual behavior have become so obfuscated that people believe they can create their own rules as they go along treacherously in life. Vicarious living is seductive. Sex is exciting and creates many copy cats.
Can two consenting adults permit each other to date other partners outside of their marriage? No! Jerome and his wife have gone awry! A couple permitting their partner in marriage to cheat is like me telling the people of Japan that it is legal to have free cable-TV. In reality, I have no jurisdiction to authorize laws or legislate anything to be free in Japan. Japan's population and commerce make the rules for Japan. Likewise, neither the husband or wife has the authority, in the sight of God, to reinvent the rules of marriage. God devises all laws of heaven and earth! God's rules govern our homes, our lives, our sex affinities and our bedrooms!
Every day, people get married in the sight of God but never pay attention to the Godly covenants to which they commit, in the sight of God. Other couples write their own covenants, and in order to avoid committing to God's covenants for marriage, will omit the essential rules of God in their own rewritten version of the vows. Impossible! Marriage embodies a commitment to a spiritual, a physical endeavor, as well as to an external community. The spiritual and the sexual must be in concert with God. The external community means that once pronounced as a married couple in Christ, the couple's role is not to just feed on each other and look only at themselves to ensure their own internal happiness. Rather, God commands us to be brought as a couple together for a larger purpose. We must work for the kingdom of God to spread God's love, and to exert our help externally to the saved and the lost community of people around us. More will be discussed about community later. For now, we focus upon just sex and spirit.The first key is: We must know the rules for sex in a right relationship , and we must also know the rulemaker.
What Is Sex and What Is Love?
When we say, “I love you” are we really speaking about sex? Are the terms love and sex interchangeable? Should we say, "I love sex with you?" instead of "I love you?" The answer is no! Sex and love are completely different. Love comes first. In fact, when we really love, sex is a byproduct of that love. What is love? The elaborteness of that term, love, is best described in the Greek, as philosophy and theology provide it. In the Greek language, the term love is expressed in three different superlatives with obvious nuances and more precise expression. One of these words for love is the kind that lives in a right relationship. It is a very special love. This special kind of love is not open for redefinition.
Love in the Greek is expressed as Eros, philia, and agape. Eros is an aesthetic love. Eros has evolved to be known as romantic love and the beauty thereof between two people. Eros, the mythological persona, degenerated into a mischievous child and is associated with Pothos (“longing”) or Himeros (“desire”) both embodying passionate, sexual love. Eros is the base for the word erotica or erotikos, which is the external stimuli with the objective for the arousal of the sexual desire. The characteristics of Eros, or romantic love are excessive self-love, narcissistic, egotistical, vainglorious, and conceited, since it seeks to please itself rather than others, though it would appear to be an outward love. Eros type of love is the physicality, the feeling, and the gratification of wants. It fills absolutely no real need. Eros is fulfillment of a purely recreational desire.
One woman disclosed to me that she was disappointed with her boyfriend because he will have nothing to do with her unless she can have sex with him. She says, "He only recognizes me with my clothes off; buck naked." He will even ask her that question before he commits to come over to visit. Another man told me that his girlfriend changes men like she changes clothes. She takes on each boyfriend for their different talents in the sex act, for example, one of them is a good kisser, one of them caresses well, one of them is more sensuous leading up to the sex act. This fits an Eros type love.
Order your autographed copy of Obsessive Sex right now!
“Obsessive Sex is a must-read for the entire
Body of Christ.”
—Bishop John
Richard Bryant
Body of Christ.”
—Bishop John
Richard Bryant
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